Note to Blueshirts

Blueshirts:

I have been struggling the past week. I have had three sober days at the office this week, but acted out at home last night (it seems we suddenly have access to high-speed wireless internet from a new neighbor - now how in the world did my addict figure that out?).

I was reading the blog of a friend whose son is also battling cancer. I found the following reflection there:

Anyway, looking at the first chapter of Job, any tragic situation gets a new framework. God has protected Job and allowed him to prosper. Job recognizes that all of his blessings are from God, and is appropriately thankful. Satan (literally, "the accuser") uses this relationship to make the charge that Job is worshiping God only because he is blessed and protected. Satan states that if Job was not protected, he would not be faithful. God then allows the test to proceed.

God entrusts His reputation to Job, and when Job is faithful, God is glorified. That frames my situation much differently. God is entrusting His reputation with me, since my words and actions are now getting much greater scrutiny than before we learned of Ian's condition. God has Ian's best interest in mind, and will take care of my son. My charge is to continue to glorify God no matter what happens.

These same thoughts can easily be applied to our struggle with addiction. Why does God allow us to continue in our struggle? Why doesn't He just heal us and take the glory? Perhaps it is because He finds it more satisfying for us to bring Him glory when life is hard and when we trust Him even while we struggle. In fact, in our addiction we have a place where we can give our utmost to God. When we trust Him to heal us and when we choose to surrender to Him even while we fight a constant desire to bring pleasure to ourselves, we give God a special gift of glory.

And so I pray:

Lord, you have blessed us with the gift of freedom of choice. May we use this choice in good times and bad to demonstrate our trust in you. May our free choices bring you glory, even when our circumstances do not.

Amen.