The addict's last entry lamented the damage caused in his relationshp by the combination of a continued pattern of acting out and then shutting down emotionally. The lament was followed by an exploration of why the addict closes himself off and refuses to share his story with his beloved. In the end, the addict felt he was at the point in recovery for a return to the three-step Addict's Polka:
Step 1: I need help!
Step 2: There is a power that can help me.
Step 3: I will make a decision to accept help from this power.
Today I went to an early morning group meeting (7:00 am). One of the other men shared his frustration and fears around sharing his experiences with his spouse. He want to be open and honest and share with her all of his successes and failures, but he is not in a position to handle negative feedback. So he is afraid to be open and suffer the negative feedback, and afraid of the impetus toward acting out even more that such negative feedback from someone he loves and trusts so much might create.
Wow!
That is exactly what the addict feels. Just understanding this dynamic may help the addict explore his emotions more openly with his beloved. What a refreshing way to start a day: new insight which can help the addict move forward.
Thank you, Fellow Traveler! Your words and willingness to share have helped this addict today.
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